Doing the Work....

Saturday night I was glued to the T.V. watching Iyanla's Fix my Life as she worked with 300 women  on fixing there love lives. 300 women all trying to find love, keep love, and nurture love. 300 women who all had something holding them back from love, and what was holding them back you might ask...themselves.  It was the pain, the shame, the guilt, the fear of the past that had shaped their current circumstance. Now that they recognized what was stopping them they had to " do the work". As I thought about my own life I wondered what "Doing the Work" actually meant. How can I do the work....

THEN IT HIT ME....



I need to really face the thing that was holding me back, face what's standing in my way. Here are three ways I began to do the work....

 

1. Tell the open honest truth about what it is. Say the things I don't want to say. I have a bad habit of not expressing my true feelings about certain matters. Especially when I feel as if they are going to hurt someone's feelings. So usually I am burying my feelings, and they end up turning into living breathing pain. Some times you have to be an advocate for you and say what needs to be said.

 

2. Feel the pain. Often the root of the very thing that we are running away from is pain. Be willing to feel it, willing to shed a tear, willing to be vulnerable. Once you have felt the pain what's their to be scared of...now you are stronger and know you can survive.  I have learned that it's alright to cry. Some may see it as a sign of weakness. I see it as a sign of strength, that one is able to be transparent.

 

3. Finally, picking yourself up, dusting off and trying again. Nothing shows true growth more than putting yourself out their again, loving again, starting another business, building a new relationship, trusting yourself, or just living.

 

Doing the work is not easy. Often times once you release one thing, you find something buried deep beneath that's even harder to work through. So you can either stick with what isn't working for you or be willing to do the work.

 

 

Share. What are important steps to your for overcoming obstacles in love and life?

 

 

Shameka