ME FIRST: To Conquer the world, you must conquer yourself.....

As I said in an early post I am in the process of reading  Black Woman Redefined by Sophia A. Nelson. It 's a great book. I have taken alot from the sixty-two pages that I have read so far. Don't worry a review will be posted as soon as I finish reading. While reading last night a line from this book caught my eye.

 WE MUST CONQUER OURSELVES FIRST!!!!

Sophia brings this line into her book as she explains that there are injustices black women face in the work place. And yes it is hard to get to the top as a black women, but you must conquer yourself first. Instead of complaining about what you do not have or what has been done to you, do something about it. Get more education, stand up for yourself.

WE CANNOT CHANGE ANYONE BUT OURSELVES!!!

So you aspire to be great? Well just remember that you are not going to make it to the top with out challenges, and you are not going to make it through those challenges if you are not at your best. Let's break this down. For example, you are trying to become a partner in your law firm. As a women you are going to face some adversity ( it's just the way of the world). Now with that adversity comes stress, aggravation, and frustration. Not to mention what may be going on in your personal life. If you have not conquered yourself, and are not at your best mentally, physically, and emotionally the stress will destroy you. Sickness, depression, and anxiety will develop and potentially  keep you from the top.

YOU HAVE TO BE CENTERED

Working on a Master's degree plus tackling a full time job is no easy task. The stress from my job, trying to maintain a 4.0 in my academic endevours, and my various family issues were eating away at me. The next thing I know I am in the hospital. Emergency surgery is needed and my gallbladder has to be removed. Can you imagine. I was like what in the world is going on. After being in the hospital a couple of days I realized that if I did not get it together and soon I would not be physically or mentally able to get where I wanted to be in life. As soon as my doctor cleared me I found a trainer and started to work out. I knew that if SheMogul was going to be a success that I had to focus, hummm.  That was the hard part. How do you get rid of the stress. Well as I said the only person or thing that I could change is myself. I started to think about what was stressing me out. I was hard on myself at work. I wanted the best program and would stop at nothing to get it. I would often come home worn out no energy to complete my homework. So I spent my weekends doing homework. This equation equales no rest!!! I did not have time for my mind or body to recharge. This had to change.

I had to change the way I thought and how I worked. While at work I made sure that I worked smart, delegating and getting my staff envolved so when I got home at the end of the day I had the energy to focus on other things that were also important to me. Instead of complaining about work, I made a change, and made it work for me.  I am not going to say that I have completely conquered myself, but I will say that I am working on it.

Leave a comment and tell us how you conquered yourself....

Shameka

 

Me First: What do you Want!

So this morning I jumped up from my bed at 7:30, pulled on some workout pants, grabbed my shoes, ran to the kitchen to find something to put in my stomach, and  ran outside to my car. The time 7:50. I had to be at the gym by 8:00 to meet my trainer. When I got to my car my passenger side window had fallen down in the door panel and I could not get it up. So the inside of my car was exposed to the world. I stood for a moment fuming wondering rather it would be alright to take my car. UGH!!! I'm mad thinking about it right now. I thought I have two options, I could jump in my car get to the gym on time, train and hope that nobody takes anything from my car. Or I could spend the next 30 minutes upset, trying to fix a problem that I know that I can't and miss my training session.

I want to loose  25 lbs. before the end of summer so that means I have to make certain sacrifices, such as working out despite how I feel or what life throws at me. Some times I get off track and tend to go back to my old habits such as eating the wrong things, or just being lazy and refusing to work out like I should, but after 3 months of going up and down on the scales I have figured out what I want. I want to be healthy, and loose 25lbs. before the end of the summer. So whats the problem?

I HAVE TO GET OVER MYSELF!!!

There are times when we know what we want and what we have to do and we just don't. Why? Well because we don't want to get up at 6:00 to write, we don't want to get off work and go sit in a classroom to earn that master's degree, we think people are going to judge us, look at us weird or give us their unsolicited opinion. Well no matter how you look at it all those things will more than likely happen as we reach for our goals or try to achieve the seemingly unachievable. The truth behind it all is that we do not want to be uncomfortable. We don't to step outside of out comfort zone, push ourselves to be great. So I say to you ,

Anything worth having is worth working for! Nothing comes for free.

Loosing that 25lbs is what I want so I'm going to live in that uncomfortableness for a while. So I am making 8 a.m workouts, and healthy food choices a priority. That strawberry short cake in the fridge is not worth that 25lbs. Thank about it, weigh the options and then make that decision that's keeping your from what you want.

Shameka

ME FIRST: Everybody Needs A Plan!

I know there is something that you  always dreamed of doing, some place that your are dying  to go, there is some idea or thought that has been tugging at you for a while now and you just don't know what to do with it. So, you need a plan, a vision...!

Right now I have the NYC itch. Every one to two years I get the itch to go to the city, and it will not go away until my feet land on Manhattan's crowded sidewalks. The thing is I just left New York a month and a half ago, but the big apple itch is driving me crazy, so I am thinking about going to hang out in the city for a couple of days Solo....no one appreciates the city like I do.

Since I have never been to the city alone I would think that I need some sort of plan, you know, so I will know where I am staying, what subway stops are near. Will I have friends in town? It doesn't have to be a schedule with the times blocked out  ( I think that would be a little to much) but something to at least guide me.

So that's my point, something to guide you...you have that dream, that thing, that idea, that itch, that thought but do you have a plan that will take you from start to finish? If you don't please sit down and jot down the path that its going to take to get where you want to be. This will give you an idea of what you are going to have to do, sacrifice, or manage to get that idea off your chest. For example it would be ideal for me to pick a date for my NYC trip, and start looking for plane ticket ( as we know the earlier the cheaper), figuring out where I would want to stay and a budget. Those are the key things that are going to make the trip happen. So if you want to loose the weight, grow your hair out, travel across country, or whatever it is you need a plan.  Here are five steps to help you with your plan:

1.Figure out your purpose: Where are are going, What are you doing, What goal are you trying to achieve.
It would be ideal to write your purpose in goal format with a deadline
2. What is it going to take?  You should be writing down all the tasks that you can think of to get you to your goal.
3. What do I have to give? Write down all the things that you would have to sacrifice in order to reach your goal. A very useful piece of information I would think.
4. What will I have to spend? Creating a budget for your endeavor will help you identify if reaching the goal is monetarily possible by the deadline or in general.

I haven't written my plan for a weekend in the city just yet, I'm still thinking about it. If I decided to get lost in  the big apple, I'm sure my plan will be up for you to see.

Hint: Don't just do one plan, do several for the big projects and small tasks. I promise it will help! Go for it.

Shameka

Note from Shameka: I'm Back

So I took a little break! Being a full time student and career women sucked up my time the last couple of months. Have no fear, summer is here and I am ready to devote some TLC to SheMogul, creating pieces that you will enjoy reading.

I guess I should explain my plan for the summer so you will know what to expect from SheMogul. Inspired by Demtria Lucus and her blog A Belle in Brooklyn where she muses on dating, how to-and how not to, I have decided to do a summer series. Lucus's first book hits stores this month. You can read more about Demtria here at BlackEnterprise.com. Demetria inspired me because she created what she wanted to see. She did not just wait for it to happen. She wanted a platform for black women to discuss  their relationship situations, issues, and problems with out judgement, so she created it. All I can say is Bravo! Many of us aspire to create the lives that we want to live but never seem to be able to get a running start.

Well SheMogul is my running start! I plan to spend the next seven weeks pouring my heart into it, trying to discover the secret to being dope, fly, bad, a boss, a leader in my own right. An ICON!  I want it all ladies, and I plan to have. For me wanting it all does not mean to have billions in the bank ( although that would be nice ;) ). I mean discovering how to be that fierce business woman, soft-loving girlfriend or wife, nurturing mother, and giving sister and daughter.  I strive to be well rounded. I am excited to announce the SheMogal summer series Me First! Me First is all about discovering and rediscovering who you are, and what you want.  It is a must if you are trying to go to the next level. I really can't wait. First on the agenda, book review: Black Women Redefined : Dispelling Myths and discovering Fulfillment in the age of Michelle Obama. I have gotten through the first 30 pages of the book and I must say that it is amazing.  If you don't have it, definitely pick it up.

More to come..... Keep reading!

Shameka

Project Go Green 2011

           

 

 Okay ladies, I thought that a great topic for this month would be to go green. Whether we realize it or not, we all have a responsibility to this planet. I know I'm guilty of taking the longest showers, tossing gum papers on the ground. I can be the worst sometimes. Now I just want to become more conscious of what role I play in helping out our environment. It is important to do our best to keep our world in the best shape possible for our children and our children's children as well.

            The 40^th Annual Earth Day will be held on April 22, 2011. My goal is to share this information with my fellow readers in hopes that we all will become more environmentally friendly by Earth Day and for the rest of our lives.

This is a great site about going green in all areas of your life.

12 Important Pro*Earth Techniques:

1.    When washing your clothes use cold and warm water instead of hot because 90% of energy is used in heating of the water.(Just make sure to get a washing detergent which works in cold water)

2.    Eliminate your junk mail. You will help out the environment by eliminating unnecessary paper flow.

3.    Switch to Compact Fluorescent Bulb (CFL's) because they use 75% less energy than incandescent and they last 10 xs longer.

4.    Run full dishwasher loads, it saves 20 gallons of water per load.

5.    Turn the water off while you are brushing your teeth, you will save water.

6.    Do not overload your dryer, and clean the lint filter after every load.

7.    Use the microwave rather than your oven to reheat meals; it uses less time and energy.

8.    Download software from internet instead of buying the package, it saves on resources.

9.    Bring reusable bags to the grocery store, this also saves on resources.

10. Whenever possible, walk to the places you need to go.

11. Use your cruise control when driving long distances.

12. Buy hand soap in bulk and continue to refill one soap dispenser.

There are many ways to go green; these are just twelve I picked. You're looking for more ways to help out? You should check out this site or this site. My goal is to start doing the best I can to conserve energy and resources for our planet. It starts with one right? Will you join? I see it as being more conscious and changing our perspective. Our resources are a blessing; let us make sure that the ones after us have the opportunity to use them as well. Earth Day is almost here!!!

~Shantell~

I have the right to shine

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate but that we are powerful beyond measure.

 

Marianne Williamson

 

This is one of my favorite quotes. I read it every time I am in a situation where I feel qausi confident. I have half the mind to paint the words on my bedroom walls in hot pink. Wouldn't it be an instant pick me up in the morning. This quote helps me remember that I have the right to shine, and you do to.

 

Shameka

Relaunching SheMogul

Hey Ladies,

I know that I have not been posting lately. Don't worry, SheMogul isnt going anywhere. I will be relaunching the blog, and I will also have tons of great content for you to read. April 1st will be the day! Look out for SheMogul goodies.

Thanks for reading,

Shameka